I don't know. Send Gabe Newell a ham sandwhich. Or a hooker. Or a hooker sandwhich.

"Who Am I?" starring Jackie Chan is a good movie.

Thank you for that wonderful story of a horribly mundane moment in your otherwise dismal life.

You know, I've never actually read Fark before.

Bash the keyboard with your face. If your text doesn't change color then your face surely will. That's just as good.

They should round up all Counter-Strike players and put them on those mystery boats where everyone gets sick on bad shellfish. Then a whale should eat the boat.

Oh god someone please let me in your clan!

Tell her to wash down there first. I've learned this the hard way.

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2018 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.