You never know what Internet spirits you'll conjure with a Google Image Search for "ancient Chinese soldiers." The 36 Strategems sub-page takes its name from a list of "ancient Chinese military tactics," but site mastermind Ivan illustrates these maxims not with China-related artwork, but instead with a dazzling array of haunted-house GIFs.

Plunge into a fire to pull off a robbery.

Cross the path in the dark.

Hide a sword in a smile.

Amazingly, 36 Strategems has much more to offer than incongruously animated Chinese combative gambits. The sidebar sub-pages range from "Why do Mr. Nice Guy always finish last?" to "Detecting a lie ... and jokes about modern day bitches," from "How to solve life problems" to "DEALING WITH STRESS." The only common link between Nocturnal Ivan's various areas of expertise is the use of ridiculous unrelated GIFS to accompany every bullet point.

(Illustration for the blurb "Mr. Misogyny")

("Make friends with Godly people")

("The Buddhist way of obeserving problems")

– Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Pardon Our Dust

    Pardon Our Dust

    Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.



    Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind

Copyright ©2024 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful