a rose thats exactly the same but different somehow so you can call it something else
weed plant that smokes itself and gets high
a tree that makes frosting instead of sap
a tree that fills itself with honey without bees so they can pursue hobbies and interests instead of just having to go gathering pollen all the time
a maraschino cherry tree, growing next to a coconut tree but the coconuts have shirley temples inside instead of coconut water, which is lame
a tomato labeled "red potato" and it grows eyes and stares at you
onions that don't make you cry but instead bolster your self esteem and body image
chickens that lay eggs without shells and whenever you need an egg you just squeeze the chicken over the mixing bowl until the right amount of liquid egg comes out
GODSPEED JOHN GLENN
Cucumbers that shoot ranch dressing when you rub them
pepper that has legs and jumps around on your food, but it's just pepper so it's ok and fun for the kids
a bean that zips around your plate and giggles when you try to stab it with your fork
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.