BYOB: an island of chill and magic in a sea of madness. : Guards! SEIZE HIM!

Doppelganger

He's getting away you fools!

Dads Dip Cup

Guard A : "h-he didn't say 'Simon says', right"

Guard B : "nope"

*staring at each other nervously*

Hugh Malone

Yeah, boss, we sees 'im. Whaddaya want us ta do, like, goes after hims or somethin?

Jedrick

Okay, you got this.

"Hey you, STORP!"

Shit, stop, I mean stop!
God dammit.
Mom was right.
Fuuck.

FutonForensic

*guards bring back a juicy honeyed ham* "well, this isn't what I asked for, but I am very satisfied with your performance all the same"

vanisher

Guards, you've lived your life fearing the commitment of a relationship too long. Guards, seize him. Hold him close. Allow yourself to love again.

google THIS

The guards start pelting him chunks of cheese. "No, no, I said SEIZE him!" I yell, shaking my head and wondering offhandedly who scribbled "Larson" on the ceiling.

LawfulWaffle

"I'm sorry, I don't know how to seize him."

>Guards! Grab him!

"I do not see any him to grab."

>Grab the man!

"Who are you speaking to?"

>Guards! He's getting away!

"I'm sorry, I don't know how to he's getting away."

More Comedy Goldmine

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Pardon Our Dust

    Pardon Our Dust

    Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.

  • DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind

Copyright ©2021 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful