A New Media Frenzy Over Something With Very Little Evidence It Actually Occurred
Reports have surfaced that some teens are doing "Vodka Salve", where a person's skin is flayed and the bare dermis soaked in vodka....
I'm Worried About Something That Has Almost No Chance Of Happening And You Should Be Too
What if my kid falls wrong and breaks their neck at daycare but I'm in a meeting and I miss my kids last words oh god....
There's A New Way To Raise Kids That's Better Than The Way Every Kid Before Ever, Anywhere, Was Raised And By Not Following It You Will Be Condemned By Your Peers
Open-Conflict Interparenting Cohesion, or OCIC, is changing the way parents everywhere deal with the exact same problems parents have been dealing with for the entire history of humanity....
There Is Only One Right Way To Raise Kids And I Will By-God Find It
I read 2 parenting books per day, and my last strategy of forcing my 9-year old to breastfeed...
Spanking My Child Hurt Me More Than It Hurt Them
While my child is fine, my hand is still stinging. I went to the chiropractor after I spanked...
I Gave My Kid An Old Camera And the 300 Pictures Of His Nose Say Something Profound About The Universe
If you want a truly transformative experience, give a child a camera. The hundreds of blurry pictures of the bottom of their face will change the way you look at...
While Technically Written To All Mothers Everywhere, There Are A Bunch Of Details Here That Clearly Indicate My Personal Mommy Issues
Mothers: If your daughter asks you if her green junior prom dress is too short, don't call in your creepy boyfriend from the TRAILER...
A Person Did A Pretty Minor Thing But I Cannot Just Brush It Off
"She's so cute!" The cashier smiled, as my heart sank and my hands started...
My Child Caught Me Masturbating And I Didn't Stop
"Mom? Mom, what are you doing?" But I couldn't stop, and you shouldn't either.
I Exclusively Pleasure Myself With Sustainable Locally Grown Produce
Fortunately, prickly pears are quite soft and pleasant after a couple days on the back porch here in Tucson...
I was kink-shamed in the produce aisle.
I couldn't believe my ears. I'm buying, why shouldn't I be able to try it out first?
(Lips smacking, mouth full of peanut butter, glistening streams of peanut butter oil running down chin) "I'm full as hell, and I'm not going to take another bite!"
I saw good men turned to mush in the wars against the soggies. Men much better than you, Mr. President. If you are going to take John Brennan's security clearance, take my security clearance too.
Bonk: The Only Good Bonk Is A Head Bonk
We review every game from the last 2 months, plus all 21 SNES Classic titles
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.