Zack: Lou Dobbs tried to warn us.

Steve: This is what happens when one of those gray alien guys from all the abduction stories smokes a lot of weed and drops out of high school to fix cars.

Zack: "Bro, trust me, I know what I'm doing. I can talk to this tiger."

Steve: Then a few minutes later he's down in the tiger cage screaming for somebody to call 911.

Zack: "911, what is your emergency?" "Yeah, I'd like to report a...looks like a ethnic version of the roaming gnome down in the tiger cage at the zoo. Looks like he's fixin' to get ate."

Steve: By the time the 911 dudes show up there'd just be a bloody cotton smock and half a mustache. And one very happy looking tiger.

Zack: If only we had someone around who could translate what the tiger was saying.

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