Cyberjack

> YOU ESCAPE FROM THE TRIANGLE ZONE. THERE’S STILL A SOLID HOUR OF MOVIE LEFT TO GO, SOMEHOW. DEPLOY POINTLESS TIME-WASTING SIDE CHARACTERS:

> VINNY THE SCHNOZ APPEARS. PASS A GUIDO CHECK FOR SUCCESSFUL DODGE.

>> Frank Sinatra was actually gay.

>> I don’t even care what my mother thinks about the women I date.

>> Hey Tony, pass the Capicola!

> SUCCESS! PEDO MUSTACHE AND STRONG OPINIONS ABOUT CULTURAL APPROPRIATION OF CAPPUCCINO AVOIDED. +100 POINTS.

> DOORBOT 9000 ACTIVATED. PREPARE TO FACE WRATH.

> CRISPY BACON: POLICE CASUALTY. FRY PIGGY FRY!

>> Uh...

> ROBOT LIVES MATTER. MOVING RIGHT ALONG...

> CAUTION! PEEKBOT TRIGGERED!

> NO, OF COURSE THAT’S NOT A DECAPITATED CYLON ON A STICK, THAT WOULD BE ILLEGAL AND WEIRD.

>> Sue for copyright infringement.

> FAILED! COUNTERSUIT INITIATED! YOU LOSE 80,000 SPACE CREDITS!