Kickin' It With Christ, submitted by Bryan. If you've ever wondered when Jesus is going to return from his vacation, it's probably not going to be until the Internet is dead and humanity has a chance to recover from the overwhelming stupidity it has brought. Case in point: Kickin' It With Christ. It's Biblical, dude!
ARE YOU READY TO KICK IT WITH CHRIST? YOU HAVE JUST ENTERED THE HOTTEST SPOT ON THE CYBER PLANET. IF YOU KNOW JESUS CHRIST AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOR THIS IS THE SPOT TO BE! IF YOU WANT TO KNOW JESUS CHRIST AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOR THIS IS AN EVEN BETTER PLACE TO BE! KICKIN IT WITH CHRIST
Unfortunately that block of text isn't describing a dark dystopian future where man is forced to live in a cyber-reality because the real one is too terrible and Jesus runs the hottest cyber bar in cyber space and he's kind of like that guy in Casablanca only he's the son of God so he has magic powers and a charisma level of 18. No, it's the sales pitch for yet another animated gif orgy created in honor of Jesus. Yes, there are all kinds of crazy animations and lame graphics, including one proclaiming that "Jesus is da man." What's interesting is that the clutter featured on this site takes on nearly artistic characteristics since it's essentially one big living, breathing, animated collage of high holiness. And Jesus wept.
BLACK LIVES MATTER!!! NOOOOOOO!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? YOU HAVE CREATED A MONSTER, AN ABSOLUTE MONSTER!
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