Hi, welcome to... oh you're looking for Brain Surgeon For Fleas?

Well, this is the wrong bounce house. You need to go that way, just past the Warhammer Miniatures Painting Workshop.


Life Or Death Jenga? Sorry, you've got the wrong place.

The bounce house you need is a ten minute walk in that direction. You'll know you've gone too far when you see the Spinning Plates Masterclass.


No, this isn't the Exceptionally Fragile Egg Warehouse.

Head that way past fourteen bounce houses. The one you're looking for is right across from Chet's Tightly-Timed Eyesight Chart Tests.


Oversized Monks Making 1/6th Scale Copies Of The Bible? Sorry, no.

You need to head that way for three miles, just past the Vinyl Record Listening Depot.


Live Bomb Defusal? Sorry, wrong place.

You're looking for the bounce house just across the way, between National Seismology Headquarters and the Live Re-Restoration Of Elias Garcia Martinez's Ecce Homo.


The Bounce Houses Aren't Real Information Center Where All Our Information Is Stored And Displayed On Etch-A-Sketches? Nope, different bounce house.

You need to head that way until you see the Porcelain Plates That Say "The Bounce House You're Looking For Is To The Left" bounce house. When you get there, take a right.


No, this isn't the Bartender Training School Where They Specifically Learn How To Fill A Glass All The Way To The Very Top Without Spilling A Drop bounce house.

What you want to do is take a left at Thirty Thousand Needles Hanging Pointy End Down From The Ceiling Held In Place By Little More Than Friction These Things Are Seriously About To Fall Dude. Then go straight for about five hours until you see the Eyelash Removal Center bounce house and take a right.


Why yes, this is the Why Are All Buildings Bounce Houses Now And Hey Where Did All The Construction Materials Go Museum! Before you enter we ask that you please remove your steel, cement, and wood shoes.

– Dennis Farrell (@DennisFarrell)

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