Feeling discriminated against, actresses like Reese Witherspoon and Jennifer Garner demanded and received better questions on the Oscars red carpet. After the questions about fashion were out of the way, red carpet reporters managed to get in some real good and solid journalism.
Q. Are you still growing taller?
Q. When do you think you stopped growing taller?
Q. Would you consider taking pills or special growth injections to become taller?
Q. What would you do if you drank a special potion that would make you taller and every day you grew taller and you could not stop growing taller?
Q. Do you hate people taller than you?
Q. Will you open this special melon for me?
Q. If you win Oscar what is spiciest special sandwich you could eat? I can eat spicier. Want to bet me?
Q. Are you afraid to open this special melon for me or just not strong enough?
Q. Is time actual or an attempt to constrain the infinite?
Q. If we are moving forward into time can will reverse direction?
Q. Is death an absolute or temporary state?
Q. Do we continue after death?
Q. Where would you like to be when you die?
Q. When you die will you continue to become taller?
Q. Does Oscar make you pretty?
Q. Would you film a sexy scene with a very ugly man?
Q. If a movie script called for you to kiss a very ugly and smelly bad man for a scene would you do it?
Q. Would you be in a movie scene with a very ugly man who is on the Internet for being ugly if you have to kiss him and rub against him?
Q. Would you take tallness pills for a very ugly man kiss scene in the ugly man kisser and toucher movie?
Q. Would you open a special melon for a very ugly man right now?
Q. Do you think women are better at acting because they lie more?
Q. What is the best size for titty?
Q. How do you take care of kids when you have to also kiss the ugly man in his movie?
Q. Do you think actresses should get paid as much as men in movies even though they are shorter and have PMS problems?
Q. What is best movie wife?
In these contentious political times it is more important than ever to work together in a bipartisan way with the people who said I should be thrown out of a helicopter for being an Antifa terrorist.
This Halloween, log off and visit your friends at the local Halloween Superstore.
Better than expected, and absolute garbage
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