Welcome to the Tumblr Botnet Control Center. From here you have access to the millions of drone accounts that blog and reblog daily. With just a few clicks, you can radically alter 90% of Tumblr to fit your needs.

Of course no actual "Content" is generated by the Tumblr Botnet, so all information must already be contained within the system. Please pick what you'd like to mindlessly reblog from the vast majority of the site's pre-uploaded popular "Content" listed below.

Wes Anderson Movie StillsKeep Calm MessagesDr. Who Gifs
Close-ups of CupcakesReimagined Disney PrincessesOwl
Ironic Dinosaur PrintsTotally Retro CamerasThinspiration
Unsolicited RantIntro to Design Final ProjectPixar Reference
BieberSmiling.gifCut-off Acid Wash DenimiPhone Text Screenshots
Suggestive Embrace in Moody Black and WhiteDariaNail Polish Occult
Washed Out Boring PictureTweedClose-up of Mascara, Lip Gloss
Mexican Skull TattooArt Deco Star Wars PostersCat (Asleep)
Shabby Chic Thrift CrapAdventure Time ReferenceCat (Kitten)
Instagram RejectsThe Solution of LoveForced 90s TV Reference
Joseph Gordon-Levitt Staring OffFaux VintageCat (Kitten (Asleep))
Oversaturated Waif in XL T-ShirtGrotesque PornographyWood Grain
Hand Written Messages Proclaiming Self-Importance$2k Handbags
Celebrity Interview Gif with SubtitlesPoorly Cropped Self-shots"Rap"
Nostalgia for 2005Fresh Tattoo on Chubby BellyLeftover Snooki
Token Videogame ReferenceSepia-Washed Teenage AngstMuse Lyrics

A simple safeguard. Ultimately, the Botnet will craft a faux persona through reblogging "Content" created by others. However, in case of emergency, it is best to have a paper-thin personality on hand to deflect any chance of human interaction. Please pick the persona that will be drowned beneath the reblogged content and opinions.

Add another depth to the Botnet by including customizations that went out of fashion in 2002. People will believe that only human error could account for such poor visual decisions.

Nonsensical Page Layout
Mysterious Button Placement
Imbedded Drake Song
Awkward Custom Cursors
Disjointed Tile Background
HTML Explosion
Endless Scrolling Hell
None (Page will function logically) [Not Suggested]

On rare occasions Tumblr accounts have been asked to make statements regarding an issue outside of preselected "Content." In an effort to make the Botnet more believable, you can allow artificial accounts to discuss the following:

Tumblr Tumblr Updates Tumblr Mythology
Tumblr Theory Tumblr History Tumblr Future
Alternate Tumblrs Tumblr Site Changes Inner Tumblr

Thank you. Please review your changes to the Tumblr community before confirming your order.

– Ian "Salmon Season" Golding (@iggolding)

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