Princess Peach is my anti-friend.
"Hey guys, Sam Raimi's guy just emailed me and said he was going to make my fanfic into a movie!!" I know this post right here alone could fill your quota of painfully sad things to read for like an entire month, but please stay with me. We have a ways to go.
I used to dream about Muzzy, that language teaching sasquatch thing, even though I never owned the tapes. "Booooonjooour... je suis... la jeune fille...." We never got it on, though.
Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no
You can't kill what's already dead, just like you can't ask to get fat what's already going swimming with its shirt on.
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
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