Rap Bitches, submitted by Tiresias. Sounding less like rap and more like some trash Europop heard through the haze of a mescaline nightmare, the Rap Bitches are fucking SET to tear up the scene with their hot new ish Ghost Boobs! Not only is their music the worst thing since sliced Hitler, they've also infected the Internet with a website so visually abrasize you might as well strap SOS pads to your monitor and rub your eyes on it.
GRAVY TRAIN!!! is the bitter brainchild of Chunx, your standard honky ho, who obsessed over JJ Fad lyrics ('I seen better pictures on a can of Alpo'), bitched about tiny-donged menz, and suffered from the frightening split affliction of burgerphilia/nymphomania. Funx soon stepped in with her winning Casio beats, frighteningly stark-faced and sexually obscene dance moves, and Spanish flair (but NOT in a Santana featuring Matchbox 20's Rob Thomas sorta way).
I give them very very diminutive props for ripping on Santana and Matchbox 20, but when you're coughing up tangy-fresh puke tracks on your latest CD you don't really have a lot of room to criticize "bland and packaged". I wish Rap Bitches a long career of playing for their friend's birthday parties at the local dive bar.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.