Vincent Gallo Merchandise, submitted by SouvlakiPlaystation. Director, actor and writer Vincent Gallo is about as eccentric as they come. Usually in Chloë Sevigny's mouth. Gallo is apparently hard up for cash or just interested in offloading some of the junk he has collected over the years at a ridiculous price.

Gallo's clearing house website oozes class like a sack of medical waste in Beverly Hills. He's roughly 30% more vile than I thought humanly possible and every single item he is selling (at roughly 10,000% of their ebay value) has some sort of horrible memory attached. Just be glad Gallo is selling the junk through the Internet. I would imagine that haggling with him in person would be similar to trying to climb a rope made out of knives.



Vincent Gallo's Personal Copy of "Chris Squire: Fish Out of Water" 8 Track Format (Very Rare)
Autographed by Vincent Gallo

$200.00*

Only One Available.

This is Chris Squire's solo masterpiece LP "Fish Out Of Water" on 8 Track format (extremely rare). Vincent Gallo has been a huge Yes fan since he was a young kid, and Yes bassist Chris Squire has always been one of his idols. At the age of 13, Vincent began a highly sexual affair with a 19 year old Buffalo slut who had her own car. Unfortunately, the slut's car's only music source was an 8 Track tape player. Though Vincent, already huge, and already a huge record collector, was famous in Buffalo for making mixed tapes, they were all mixed on cassette and could not be played in the slut's car. During these crude sexual encounters Gallo was starved for music, something to distract him from her alcoholic breath.

Maybe he's trying to get the millions necessary to hire an A-list actress for his next movie. Watch out Brad Pitt, Gallo wants to pay your baby mama to blow him.

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.