ManHood, submitted by GE Cafe. If there is one debate that I simply cannot fathom, it's the whole "circumcision is evil" debate. Sure, when it's done to girls it's an awful thing, but it doesn't really make life all that horrible for a guy. In fact it pretty much doesn't do shit, save for getting rid of the concept of smegma, which is disturbing and well worth some minor mutilation when you think about it. All this energy wasted on an act that's basically inconsequential in the long run is pretty ridiculous. Some people are more passionate about preserving foreskin than they are about the environment, human life, and a million other subjects. If you're going to have an obsession, at least get a good one, like Tetris or that girl that said no when she really meant yes.

Thankfully (I guess) somebody out there is concerned with this whole loss of sensation thing and has created a little poncho you can wear around your penis that apparently acts just like foreskin, only it's fake. Since the product is called "ManHood" I can only assume it is marketed entirely to gay guys or guys so consumed with the circumcision debate that they have not had the opportunity to ever have sex with a female. I just know that I would be laughed at and ridiculed if, in the midst of passion with a lady, I pulled out a tiny white straight jacket and put it on my package. And rightly so, if you ask me.

– Josh "Livestock" Boruff (@Livestock)

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.