February 14 is only a few weeks away, which means people with their priorities in order have one pressing question: Where can I find a Valentine's Day costume for my guinea pig? Fortunately, Cuddly Cavies (or as the site's title bar indelicately puts it, "ratcostumes") has just the outfits to gussy up your rodent for a romantic evening! And unlike those Valentine's Day stores that pop up at the mall peddling their wares the day after Christmas and disappear on 2/15, Cuddly Cavies remains open for all your St. Patrick's, Easter and 4th of July guinea pig-wardrobe needs. You can also buy guinea pig diapers, good year round! And you can even make your guinea pig look like another animal, like a bumblebee or a cow, which is much more practical than keeping an actual bumblebee or cow as a pet.

Cuddly Cavies appeared in a South Park episode back in 2008 (here's a clip, soundtracked -- like most things on YouTube -- by a Disturbed song), but people might have assumed they were one of the show's fictional creations, like Scuzzlebutt or Barbra Streisand. But they are real and available now for your special night! (Money orders only.)

– Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.