Let me start by saying that even at less than 2 minutes long, this video is still way too fucking tedious to watch, so if you don't make it, I don't blame you. This is basically a 2 minute long "lol gay" joke. You see, this man... he has no tongue, and that makes communication difficult! Hilarity ensues!
Of course, by "hilarity", I mean make sure you watch the local news tonight because there is a good chance there will be a manhunt for yours truly in progress after I murder these idiots to death with a hammer.
"ok........every second of this video isnt funny at all...
"just jerk off"
"this aint real"
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Youtube user HolkHogan420 has been systematically exposing all of the Illuminati's plans.
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!