You know what I love? Products and services. I love 'em. If I have one problem with products and services, it's that every aspect of every instance of them sickens me beyond measure. As usual, it's the SA forum goons to the rescue, with these improvements on many of your favorite products and services, such as "Food shop" and "Car"!
a compass that point directly towards your car keys at all times
also it travels back in time so i already have one and can use it to find out where my car keys are right now
a watercooler/water fountain that displays the daily news and other common talking points
A bar of soap with a charging station for your MP3 player so you can listen to music while you clean.
Bizzaro fandango.com where people buy tickets to movies they don't want to see that takes money away from the movie's box office gross.
A baseball cap, the front of which is a hidden panel that contains a telescoping arm.
At the end of the arm is a hand with the index finger raised so it can shoot out of the hat and cover someone's lips to shush them if you want them to stop talking.
A land mine with a confetti charge you can bury in someone's yard the night before their birthday.
A refrigerator that uses a voice-activated air cannon to launch beers at thirsty owners
Online dating website but for video games. You answer personality questions and it matches you with a video game that you may be interested in.
Or you get the Tinder version and just swipe right on all of the games with cool box art.
Facebook app that shares erotic dreams about coworkers
Cigarettes that make you look uncool, so you can smoke around kids without worrying about them wanting to imitate your behavior.
Republicans announce that all legislation must be voted on at 2am in a secret chamber, with no one but the lobbyists who write the bills seeing a single line of text. Democrats' Response: Stumbling around a field stepping on rakes, handles smashing them directly in their faces every single time.
There is a witch hunt going on right now and I promise you that you will not find any witches in the pleasure room in my congressional office.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
Buy three Epic Loot Crates for only $7.99, get a free fourth loot crate for only $2.99!
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