Spoondick
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: do you like christian music?
You: trick question, nobody really likes christian music
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Shoft Madder
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: We have detected illegal file-sharing software running on your computer
Stranger: hi
You: Please stay connected while we trace your IP
You: ...10%...
You: ...20%...
You: ...30%...
Stranger: eeer
You: ...40%...
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Operator
You: hi
Stranger: hello there
Stranger: how are you today?
You: good
You: what about you?
Stranger: fine. just woke up
You: nice
You: where are you?
Stranger: finland. and you?
You: I'm right outside your house
You: could you open the curtains please?
Stranger: we don't even have curtains :P
You: blinds?
Stranger: yep
You: oh
You: I'm outside the wrong god damn house again
Stranger:
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Safety Shaun
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: oh god im not so good at computers how did i get here
Stranger: haaahhhh!
Stranger: youre joking?
You: is my internet working?
Stranger: are u serious.. where are you from?
You: hold on doing a netstat
You: right got your IP, scanning for vulns
Stranger: exuseme
Stranger: ???
Stranger: whaat
You: hahaa holy shit you aren't running an up to date firewall
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
–
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.
Previous Articles
- Horrible crap out of the blue!
- Draw Your Way across a Cliff!
- Hitler Auditions
- Personal Encounters With Celebrities
- MSPaint a new face for Pikachu!
