A girl in my Literary Criticism class, "I can't believe Bush got re-elected, nobody I know voted for him."
I go to school in Canada.
I try to console myself thinking that maybe she had a lot of American friends, but still...
This was some time early on in High School:
"Who can tell me what London is famous for?"
"The Big Apple?"
Another occasion (same guy):
"Now, who can tell me which industrial sector is responsible for turning natural resources into primary products?"
High school AP history:
"So I'm confused. Was Lincoln, like, the commander-in-chief of the southern army, or was he for the north?"
Some guy asked what "invasion" meant, once. It was in the 11th grade US History class. For a moment, I wasn't sure if he was mocking me or not
Public Affairs 101:
"What does adversity mean?"
I have a lot these.
"What started World War 2?" This was followed by "I thought Pearl Harbor was attacked in the first war."
"Who was Stalin?"
"Could you survive on a desert island drinking nothing but whiskey?"
"The Hitler youth was like, his like friends in school right?
"Old people should have to take test every three months, but not us" This was right after the girl got done saying she has been through 8 vehicles and just crashed her boy friends brand new truck the night before.
Theres more but I am wanting to hurt my self just recalling these ones.
In my 10th grade history course we were watching Saving Private Ryan, and in the beginning of the movie there's a long scene of the D-Day landing on Omaha beach. I happened to be sitting next to an attractive yet rather stupid girl. Why do the hot ones always have to be retarded? Anyway...
"Are they shooting at the guys on the beach?"
"...Yes, this is a scene depicting the D-Day landing in Normandy in 1944."
"But, like why are they killing them? I don't understand."
During an acting styles class, a classmate was doing a scene from The Cherry Orchard.
He had figured out he was trying to seduce the girl, but didn't realize he was lying.
"Why would I lie if I was trying to seduce her?" he asked oh so innocently.
We had about a good two or three minute laugh after he realized what he'd asked.
Transgressive author Chuck Palahniuk is here to help with tips and tricks to hacking your life.
Not what I had in mind when I ordered an Italian gondolier. This is literally just a tiny toy. Needless to say, the Italian businessmen were not impressed and I looked like a damn fool. We lost the pizza pie account and will have to lay off half our factory.
Time to applaud the man who applauds in a loop until the end of time.
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