The 10 Reasons We Will Never Review F.A.T.A.L.
#1 Rules for a baby's butthole

Steve: Here they are. The two most shameful tables ever included in an RPG.
Zack: Necessary for when you're gaming and you reach the inevitable question, "How many fingers fit in a baby's anus?"
Steve: Roll for baby's anus.
Zack: Yes, 100! And she's a nympho, so that means...25. This baby can handle three fingers no problem.
Steve: Thank goodness it was a slut baby.
Zack: I don't even want to joke about this anymore.
Steve: I want to die.
