In celebration of Halloween, SA's resident fashion goblins Dr. Thorpe and Zack will be dribbling out a spooky Halloween-themed morsel of Fashion SWAT every day until October 30th. On the spookiest of days you will find a special Halloween treat!
Description:You will love dressing your dogs for photo opportunities and parties in our hilarious Piggy Pooch costume.
Made of soft polyester with Velcro® closures for easy fastening and a secure fit.
This cute costume includes a little pig tail, and a hood with pig ears and snout to complete the look.
Zack: Today's dog bears a distinct resemblance to Alice Cooper being vomited out of a pig's mouth.Dr. Thorpe: Yeah, there's something really violent and disturbing about this, like the dog has flayed a pig and is wearing its skin, and he's looking us like "you're next, queer."
Dr. Thorpe: And I say "queer" because there's also an element of sexual menace in this, but maybe that's just me projecting.
Zack: You could be right. That dog could have brutally flayed the skin from that doll-eyed pig. The alternative is even more terrifying. What if the pig is completely unconcerned with the dog's head projecting out of its mouth?
Zack: Maybe the dog head is just part of how the pig does business. Maybe the pig is some terrible dog symbiote like those tongue-eating crustaceans that end up in fish mouths or maybe it's part of the pig like those inner jaws in Aliens.
Dr. Thorpe: I don't know, the dog's crooked leer makes me think he's the aggressor in this situation, and the pig is just another victim.
Dr. Thorpe: "Pig was lookin' at me funny so I jumped through its asshole."
Zack: The pig was apparently slithering around too. The Korean costume makers just decided cows have six legs and pigs have none.
Zack: "Pig come up out of ground like worm. Big worm! Oink, oink! No teeth, big asshole!"
Dr. Thorpe: My perfect woman.
Zack: Lair of the Pig Worm.
Dr. Thorpe: Have you picked up Max Hardcore's Oink Oink No Teeth Big Asshole BBW Gapefest #44 yet?
Zack: I have #43 but it was too disgusting for me. Some of those women looked over 20.
Dr. Thorpe: Which, by porn standards, makes them MILFs. Milves?
Zack: It follows the dwarf standard. "Dwarfs in real life and dwarves in Tolkein."
Zack: In this case we're definitely talking Tolkein standards, making "Milves" the appropriate plural.
Dr. Thorpe: You know he came up with a whole Milven language?
Zack: Max Hardcore, you mean? It's based on those froggy gagging and puking sounds women make when he's around.
A broadcasting legend pleads with the world of the living.
The human anatomy is home to more than three hundred organs. Doctors and chocolatiers agree that the vast majority of these revolting lumps of tissue serve little to no function. If you find yourself standing in a long line or stuck at the airport waiting for a delayed flight, consider taking a few minutes to remove the following from your person.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!