Zack: We might be edging into the 70's on this one. When was the last time people wore fluted vests and pauldrons?
Steve: What time is it right now?
Zack: This game looks more fun than Mech Assault 2, which is a good thing, because that was a pretty fun game.
Zack: For a bitch idiot to play.
Steve: They're not playing a game, bro. This is deadly serious. This is the situation room of the future.
Zack: That would make the guy with the beard Hillary Clinton and I think the woman talking into her giant headset and seemingly holding a pancake house's syrup carafe is Joe Biden.
Steve: Dumping syrup on a Locust sounds like something he'd do.
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.