Zack: Old lady shades, stump arm, and pathetically tiny pistol. The design boys really went all out to make this thing as intimidating as possible.
Steve: I think it was Sun Tzu who said something about let your enemy underestimate you or something.
Zack: That's gotta be a first, a person using a Sun Tzu quote to make themselves look stupider.
Steve: The stupider is on you, buddy, because I didn't quote Sun Tzu, I paraphrased him.
Zack: Allow me to paraphrase Sun Tzu also: He who talks about baby buttholes on the previous page doesn't have room to call anyone stupid.
Steve: Sun Tzu didn't really say that.
Zack: It's called paraphrasing, Steve. Look it up.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.