Zack: He's offering up an ice-cold beverage from his chest-mounted 12-pack coolers.
Steve: "Yo, buds, it's me, Dervish, the partyingest mech on Solaris! Pull up a beach towel, grab a cold brew, and plug something into my arm outlets!"
Zack: "Wow! Couple of Jagermechs and an Awesome at 6 o'clock. Hey now, boys, don't look right at them, you'll scare them off!"
Steve: "Ohhhh ugh they're with an Archer! One of you two gets the Archer. Take one for the team."
Zack: He can mix drinks in his legs and if you critical hit his head a burrito will pop out of that triangle in his chest.
Steve: "What's up, baby? Is your name Kerensky? Cuz I ain't seen double heatsinks like those since I visited Strana Mechty."
Zack: Alright, now that's just gratuitous.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Sorry about the blurry photo. I was lunging at my phone, yelling at it to take a clear picture. It's the only image of me that exists. I'd take another picture for you, but I'm in the middle of a rigorous trampoline session.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.