Zack: I wanted to start things off tame with this one. It's going to get a lot worse, folks. Just a heads up.
Steve: This picture looks good to me.
Zack: Pretty standard fare for RPGs and video games pandering to a majority male audience. Nothing shocking, really, except the quantity. Exalted features breasts in almost every picture.
Steve: My kind of game.
Zack: They don't care if it's a necromancer woman, an assassin, or a monster lady. They will all have huge breasts prominently displayed.
Steve: I don't understand why people are suddenly all up in arms over boobs. Boobs are great. Should they be hidden away in shame? Let's put them out there.
Zack: Rather than lecture you about male gaze and objectification, which I think you know and you're just playing dumb, I am going to point out that MONSTER LADIES DON'T NEED TITS.
Steve: Yeah, but they don't don't need boobs either.
Zack: Do you eat candy for every meal?
Steve: Define candy.
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.