On March 20th, we introduced our 1990s era Call of Cthulhu contest based around our imaginary module "Hard Ticket to Baghdad." Readers were asked to submit art loosely themed around the 1990s, Call of Cthulhu and, in honor of Ultimate Warrior, professional wrestlers. We will be playing this imaginary module in the near future, but today we announce the contest winners and celebrate some of the other entries. As always, a big thanks to everyone who submitted an entry to the contest, even the guy who sent us an MS-Paint drawing of a dick. It was just what we needed.
Zack: Steve, are you as excited as I am about announcing the winners of our contest?Steve: I am probably more excited than you about everything. You've accused me of being excitable before.
Zack: You have to admit, that time you realized that White Castle has a breakfast menu.
Steve: They have toast sandwiches dude. And breakfast sliders with eggs. I bet I could eat fifteen of those things.
Zack: They say that every whole egg you eat takes a day off your life, I'm guessing that with egg sliders they mean you spend the whole day on the toilet.
Steve: Yeah, real nice, dude. Welcome everyone to our big contest with a bunch of nasty bathroom jokes. How do you expect our memes to go viral?
Zack: We just keep creating content and hoping for the best.
Zack: Which is what you're doing whenever you eat a breakfast slider.
Steve: Ohhhh man, let's just get on with it.
The human anatomy is home to more than three hundred organs. Doctors and chocolatiers agree that the vast majority of these revolting lumps of tissue serve little to no function. If you find yourself standing in a long line or stuck at the airport waiting for a delayed flight, consider taking a few minutes to remove the following from your person.
Do you have what it takes to make it on the ballot?
Denzel is here to set the movie scales back to zero. That's what an equalizer does, right?
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.