Zack: The real hook horror is when this poor guy has to zip up.
Steve: Jeez, or turn a doorknob.
Zack: It's like somebody started to copy off something from Dark Crystal and then just sighed and gave up when they got to the hands. And they started with the hands.
Steve: Actually, this fellow looks a lot like the crabman from the first part with a full-on bird head and handicapped hands.
Zack: He also looks like he just got caught trying to escape from prison and he's about to get chased out of frame by bullets from a tommy gun.
Steve: The Dame Wore Hooks!
Zack: Of all the two-copper screech caves in Underdark she had to scuttle into mine.
Steve: Her exoskeleton was all curves, like an '8' with a bird head.
Zack: Her clacking said "yes," but her hooks said "no."
Master is troll wizard, so's if he get angry he might cast spell up on my self and bite off my whole head in one chomp.
It's true. Grimace is human. God help us, we did our best for him.
Kirk Cameron destroys the internet with his rage and jacks it to boats, hallelujah!
The famed gonzo otaku journalist writes about the death of gaming culture in 2014.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.