Lowtax: "OH GOD THE SNAKES STOLE ALL MY DOORS AND ARE GETTING AWAY!!"
Zack: I'm waiting for them to be pursued through an ominous doorway by cops and then come out chasing the cops in a more distant ominous doorway.
Lowtax: This is one of those fake perspective images, the hallway really only extends two feet. The entrance at the end is 3 inches tall.
Lowtax: We're looking inside Barbie's Nightmare Cottage
Zack: That would be much better than what I was thinking: the hallway needs a brazilian.
Zack: It's summer, Rich. You can't go to the beach with tentacles sticking out of your bikini.
Lowtax: But my bikini is actually just a wad of tentacles
Zack: What do you think the title of this masterpiece might be?
Zack: I'm thinking "Worst room service at shittiest hotel."
Lowtax: "I'll Get Better"
Zack: "Flip this hell house"
Lowtax: I guess it really doesn't matter that the snakes stole his doors since the spider already stole his key.
Zack: And really, what is a head on a stack of books going to do with all those doors anyway?
Lowtax: The undead are hoarders!
Lowtax: The undead hoard.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Today's viral teen news beat, brought to you by Mike from the Internet!
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Doing some reps on the water bottle huh. I prefer bench press myself. Just kidding - stay hydrated.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.