Zack: While you are using your enormous sword to scrape blood from your master there is a loud bang.
Steve: "Oh meow no!" I had better investigate this noise.
Zack: A large part of your survival bunker is filled with smoke. You failed to clean the ventilation shaft C14 in a timely manner and it has exploded into the bunker, covering everything with dust even as smoke continues to churn from the ruptured duct.
Steve: Is there a way to put out the fire?
Zack: The bunker has a fire suppression system, but it is toxic so you will need to get a gas mask from the storage closet.
Steve: Alright I do that then and active the fire suppression system.
Zack: The gas mask won't fit over your elf ears.
Steve: Blankets. I can smother the fire with blankets. Are there any blankets?
Zack: All of the bunk blankets are labeled "HIGHLY FLAMMABLE." There are some blankets in the master's bedroom. Do you want to go in there?
Steve: Alright, swinging my boobs all over and fake crying I will enter the master's bedroom to get his blankets.
Some of the Internet's most veteran anatomy experts convened to discuss the stolen nude photos of Jennifer Lawrence and other beautiful celebrities.
Master is troll wizard, so's if he get angry he might cast spell up on my self and bite off my whole head in one chomp.
We're spelunking through the movie catacombs this week. Join us, won't you?
Kirk Cameron destroys the internet with his rage and jacks it to boats, hallelujah!
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.