Zack: Everything is covered with dust. You get the blanket and put out the fire by throwing the blanket onto it.
Steve: I will meticulously clean up all the dust to earn the master's favor.
Steve: And I'm like bending over in my maid outfit so my ripped butt is sticking out and dropping my book bags and stuff to flirt with master.
Zack: The inscrutable machine offers you no feedback.
Steve: I'm going to fix the duct thing then. See what he thinks of that when my boobs are all worked up into a lather.
Zack: Do you even know what boobs are?
Steve: Uh, very funny, yeah. I am something of an expert.
Zack: Alright, while you are fixing the duct you discover an item:
Steve: Oh heck yes! This will come in handy the next time master tries to have romance with me against my will.
Zack: Your master has never tried anything with you except dispensing supplies.
Steve: I will secretly place it in his bedroom next to his regular condoms.
Can't tell a drinking fountain from a urinal? We've got you covered. Brush up on your drinking fountain enthusiast -- or sipper -- vocabulary and learn to talk and swap sips with the best of them.
2 PM: Steven J. accidentally drops his vintage Trapper Keeper, revealing erotic drawings of the ‘bunny girls’ emoji. The room draws silent. Slowly, member after member opens his/her notebooks and tablets, revealing dozens of pages of bunny girl emoji fanart. The room votes 12-0 never to speak of this again.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.