Zack: I think that woman with the sign just went ahead and stuffed the whole camel down the front of her pants.
Steve: Dude this game is really terrible. I mean, that wasn't even an adventure. What was that?
Zack: I tried to introduce a little realism. The adventures in this game are basically rolls on a random encounter chart. You could come up with great adventure seeds like this:
Steve: Dang it, I could have been a maid in space instead of some lousy bunker?
Zack: We can't choose the maid we are born to be.
Steve: So what's so bad about this game? Other than the weird flirty stuff it just seems like a lame anime RPG.
Zack: Yeah, I guess, but there is this one thing about the characters in the book...
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.