Steve: This guy should never have a problem finding a job.
Zack: "Uh, sorry, Doctor...Druid, was it? I am terribly sorry. The truth is, you are overqualified for this position. Bob Evans is only interested in hiring a druid, not a doctor."
Steve: "It says on your resume that you can levitate at a feeble rank. Could we see that before you go?"
Zack: "Of course, but I will need an air hockey table and about ten minutes to psych myself up."
Steve: He has incredible powers of illusion that unfortunately do not extend to male pattern baldness.Zack: "Bodily Control: Dr. Druid has remarkable control over his own body functions." Is this really a power?
Steve: It is when it's "remarkable control." He can drive all the way across the country without needing to pee.
Zack: He can totally keep his eyes open when he sneezes.
Steve: Just not while he's levitating.
Want to take part in our much-publicized trade in program to swap an old tablet or video game for in-store credit? Great! We just need your license, home phone number, email address, work number, and your fingerprints. We might even take a mugshot of you.
Are you ready to be consistently depressed by how you're throwing your money and life away? Check out Loot Crate's 2015 lineup of upcoming crates!
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.