Steve: This guy should never have a problem finding a job.
Zack: "Uh, sorry, Doctor...Druid, was it? I am terribly sorry. The truth is, you are overqualified for this position. Bob Evans is only interested in hiring a druid, not a doctor."
Steve: "It says on your resume that you can levitate at a feeble rank. Could we see that before you go?"
Zack: "Of course, but I will need an air hockey table and about ten minutes to psych myself up."
Steve: He has incredible powers of illusion that unfortunately do not extend to male pattern baldness.Zack: "Bodily Control: Dr. Druid has remarkable control over his own body functions." Is this really a power?
Steve: It is when it's "remarkable control." He can drive all the way across the country without needing to pee.
Zack: He can totally keep his eyes open when he sneezes.
Steve: Just not while he's levitating.
Your lair. Maybe you lure victims to it, maybe you hide in it between killings, or maybe you haunt it 24/7 because you’re tragically confined by a curse. Whatever the situation, for most of us monsters, a living/un-living space is an important part of our identities. In this column, Monstergeddon award winners share their lair tips and techniques!
Works great on my child, who hasn't barked at all for as long as she's worn the apparatus. When she turns three, we will remove it for a trial period.
The famed gonzo otaku journalist writes about the death of gaming culture in 2014.
Try not to break your console while I try not to break my cyber brain.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.