Steve: This guy should never have a problem finding a job.
Zack: "Uh, sorry, Doctor...Druid, was it? I am terribly sorry. The truth is, you are overqualified for this position. Bob Evans is only interested in hiring a druid, not a doctor."
Steve: "It says on your resume that you can levitate at a feeble rank. Could we see that before you go?"
Zack: "Of course, but I will need an air hockey table and about ten minutes to psych myself up."
Steve: He has incredible powers of illusion that unfortunately do not extend to male pattern baldness.Zack: "Bodily Control: Dr. Druid has remarkable control over his own body functions." Is this really a power?
Steve: It is when it's "remarkable control." He can drive all the way across the country without needing to pee.
Zack: He can totally keep his eyes open when he sneezes.
Steve: Just not while he's levitating.
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.