Steve: Pursuing the most dangerous game: moisture.

Zack: When the prey feels like it is being followed and it suddenly turns around the hunting cactus is excellent at freezing in place and acting nonchalant.

Steve: Doesn't work so well indoors.

Zack: *cactus searches frantically for pot to hide in*

Steve: In some ways being followed around by a cactus is actually scarier than being chased by a regular monster.

Zack: I bet they would make great detectives in the Southwest.

Steve: Saguaro, P.I.

Zack: "Si, senor. We will learn if your wife is cheating. Also, if you could leave some large, empty pots scattered around your house it would really help."

Steve: "We'll also need someone to drive us and carry us everywhere because, btw, we are plants."

Zack: "Just set us on a skateboard and give us a push in the direction of clues."

More WTF, D&D!?

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.