Zack: This is that high water mark Hunter S. Thompson talks about. The monster manual wave has broken. The high point has been reached.

Steve: "I'm attacking this reef with my sword. How many hit points does it have?" *The DM pages helplessly through his books. "I JUST DON'T KNOW!!!!"

Zack: "Roll initiative."

Steve: Can't wait to get Keith and Jamie and maybe Rick in and build a whole adventure around some coral. Snorkel Outing of Elemental Evil.

Zack: Expedition to the Barrier Reef.

Zack: You know the subsequent Monstrous Compendiums featured all the usual retreads of this like "undead coral" and "giant coral" and "coral golem."

Steve: Dire coral.

Zack: From hell's heart, I gently undulate at thee.

Steve: This coral can only be defeated by placing some starfish on it.

Zack: If the party remains stationary for 6-8 months they're doomed.

More WTF, D&D!?

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.