Steve: Savaged by Seamonkeys!
Zack: Five minutes before this scene these guys were in their life raft squinting at the horizon.
Zack: "What is that? Fish?"
Steve: Imagine their surprise when a hundred monkeys swarmed the raft.
Zack: I don't have to imagine it! Their surprise is right there being overwhelmed by the frenzied monkeys.
Steve: Life of Pi would have been much better as one guy fighting a swarm of monkeys for three hours instead of a standoff with a tiger.
Zack: They wheel the last old and gray monkey survivor past this dude's grave.
Steve: *laser sounds*
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.