Steve: Returnnnn your overdue liiiIIIbbrary books!
Zack: Dr. Manhattan got halfway through reassembling himself and decided to go grope women instead.
Steve: "Time exists all at once, so we've totally already done it, so, like, you might as well do it with me."
Zack: "A live boner and a dead boner contain the same number of particles."
Steve: And then he teleports her to his turtle pit on Mars.
Zack: Half of Dr. Manhattan is apparently the Bad Lieutenant of Watchmen.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.