Zack: Hello gorgeous!
Steve: This is the hot babe?
Zack: It says so right there. Fatima Khan is a dusky-skinned beauty who dresses like a typical college student.
Steve: She looks like the crazy lady that used to live behind the tannery by my bus stop. She would come out in the morning and try to sell us dolls she made out of her hair.
Zack: Did you ever buy any of that dusky-skinned beauty's hair dolls?
Steve: No, although she gave one to me once. She said she made it for me and she walked up and took it out of her mouth and put it in my hand before I could do anything. It was really cold that day and I remember looking down at my hand and it was steaming and wet.
Zack: You lead a charmed life, Steve.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.