Zack: So we played Traveller last weekend. Spent seven hours making a character with a history, flaws, and motivations as long as a novella. Mapped out his whole career and all his relationships. Used software to figure out how much fuel my spaceship would use. Then I was killed by a jet shark.
Steve: What's that!?
Zack: You know what a jet is, right?
Steve: Yeah, dude, like an airplane.
Zack: Yeah, it was that, plus a shark. It was a jet shark.
Steve: Is that it then? You quit?
Zack: Nah, I'm making a new character. I hired a couple of temps and I've got them working in shifts.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.