Steve: This was the dude from Planescape.
Zack: I rolled a face!
Steve: Aw, man, I rolled eye and wing and arm and leg.
Zack: Hold on a second. According to the text these guys are archers "capable of wielding 2 bows at the same time." How!?
Steve: Maybe when he's flying he can hold the bows with his feet and shoot them with his hands. What I want to know is how they have intercourse.
Zack: Have you ever seen a computer defrag?
Steve: I'm not into that sort of thing, dude.
This Week on Something Awful...
Meditations from a Movable Weiner
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Achtung! Cthulhu Adventure: Catch-666 (Part 1)
Zack takes Steve on an adventure into weird World War 2 courtesy of Achtung! Cthulhu.
Realistic Expectations For This Year's Biggest Games
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
About This Column
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.
Previous Articles
- Rifts: Core Book
- Dungeons & Dragons: Dungeon Module S1 "Tomb of Horrors"
- Dungeons & Dragons: Deities & Demigods (Cthulhu Edition)
- Dungeons & Dragons: 1st Edition Monster Manual (part 2)
- Dungeons & Dragons: 1st Edition Monster Manual (part 1)
