Steve: This was the dude from Planescape.
Zack: I rolled a face!
Steve: Aw, man, I rolled eye and wing and arm and leg.
Zack: Hold on a second. According to the text these guys are archers "capable of wielding 2 bows at the same time." How!?
Steve: Maybe when he's flying he can hold the bows with his feet and shoot them with his hands. What I want to know is how they have intercourse.
Zack: Have you ever seen a computer defrag?
Steve: I'm not into that sort of thing, dude.
This Week on Something Awful...
Let's Get Way More Specific With Our Lists of the Top Rich People
Top 10 Billionaires in the World? Most Powerful People in Tech? We've seen lists just like these for decades now. Recent features like Best Billionaires Under 40 have attempted to shake things up by getting more specific, but they need to go even further.
I Cannot Continue to Review Mobile Games for a Network Funded by Vladimir Putin
RT mobile games reviewer Jeff Glukhov quits RT after being forced to give pro-Russian reviews to various iPhone and Android games.
Merlin and the Book of Beasts
James Callis delivers easily the best-worst Merlin performance of the last 500 years.
Recaption New Yorker Cartoons!
These cartoons make a lot more sense now, thanks to these straight-shooting captions from the Goons!
Call of Cthulhu "1990's Handbook" - Saved by the Yith (part 5)
Kurt Cobain and gang finally learn the truth behind Morton Downey's evil scheme.
About This Column
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.
Previous Articles
- Rifts: Core Book
- Dungeons & Dragons: Dungeon Module S1 "Tomb of Horrors"
- Dungeons & Dragons: Deities & Demigods (Cthulhu Edition)
- Dungeons & Dragons: 1st Edition Monster Manual (part 2)
- Dungeons & Dragons: 1st Edition Monster Manual (part 1)
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