Zack: You know, there's not a whole lot to a statue of liberty costume. I have to give this one credit for fucking up every single element other than the torch.
Dr. Thorpe: Hey, at least they got the binder and the droopy crown right. That binder is an enduring symbol of American opportunity.
Zack: It's so bad I can't even tell if it's just horrible or if it's trying to be some sort of political commentary about how America is melting. F*ck Bu$h!
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Fashion SWAT... the fashion industry is obsessed with impracticality. We know that what designers create was never meant to be worn by the grimy masses, but that doesn't somehow diminish how ridiculous many of these costumes are. Make no mistake, they are costumes, and like a Halloween prize pageant we will turn our discerning gaze on the grievous fashion misfires of Paris, Milan, and New York. We're not pulling any punches, and we're definitely not interested in making any friends. We're Joan Rivers without Melissa Rivers to temper our screeching. We're the Fashion Police in jack boots. We are Fashion SWAT.