Curator of sexy lists and off-color comments about body parts, heavy.com, is proud to present an authoritative list of the 5 most dick-raising T&A bombs currently serving on the House Committee on Armed Services. Gentlemen, get ready to crank out another flagon of that bald gorilla gravy.
Getting sleazy with Marc Veasey? Don't mind if we do. This chocolate hunk from Texas's lucky number 33 hits our sweet tooth and chubs our pants pugs with his lines of inquiry and pro-military voting record. Guys, pick up your chins off the floor, that was a procedural motion he just made. Because Marc Veasey knows you like to watch him. That's the only possible explanation for the way he shakes our cream whips.
This is very real. As an insider I possess damning evidence that could utterly destroy Something Awful. This website has many enemies who appear to be coming to power in the United States. They probably have lots of money at their disposal, and I could really use some.
Don't let the winter dryness destroy your sinuses.
Featured articles and columns that don't fit anywhere else on Something Awful.