If there is one person sure to get the heart rates up and get guys talking around the water cooler it has got to be Robert Brady. This democratic diesel dick dynamo from Pennsylvania's first district is all about TCOB. No, not taking care of business, Taking Care Of Boners, which is what you'll have to do the next time you see him on CSPAN3 flapping his BJ business about prisoner transfers from GITMO. One look at Rep. Brady and you're going to need to rap your lady prod with a whole roll of Brawny just to catch the sex sauce blasting out of your nozzle.
AAWWWWWWW YEAH FAP FAP FAP! Arizona finishes strong with Rep. Franks from Arizona's 8th, but he's first to our dicks. If you haven't pounded a ghost out of your jockey rocket at least once while gazing at Trent Franks then we don't even think you're human. With Trent it's all about the breasts and if you're anything like us you'd saw off your legs for a chance to spread jam on his toast. You can tell Trent is begging for it, so what are you waiting for?
The treacherous New England Patriots are guilty of deflating their footballs. We must punish them severely in the name of holy retribution. This transgression has been the biggest headline in the United States for an entire week, and it should be the primary concern of all nations.
We have used extensive market research to determine the average consumers of America's favorite rolls of caramel-oozing choco cysts.
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