We soon found more blacks like celebrity black Wrestle Simmons who looked less powerful than JASON.
Us: You're wearing a pink sweater.
Wrestle Simmons: And I'm black.
Us: This is totally throwing all of our preconceptions on their ear...
Wrestle Simmons: Welcome to my world now...the Wrestle Simmons of America.
Us: Can we ask you about being black?
Wrestle Simmons: Sure. I don't mind.
Us: Who is that picture in the background?
Wrestle Simmons: I don't know, just a guy with a head shaped like a banana and glowing eyes.
Us: It's a little bit scary.
Wrestle Simmons: Yeah. Yeah, I can see that. A little bit.
Us: Like a-
Wrestle Simmons: Don't you go there!
Us: Like a-
Wrestle Simmons: I'm warning you!
Us: Like a scary skeleton.
Wrestle SImmons: Thank y-
Us: Of a black man!
Wrestle Simmons: OHHHHH!!
Wrestle Simmons chased us off his property shaking his fist, but we remembered something another black man had said to us:
So we decided to go find out from a white why they all hate blacks so much...
Step One: Salvage a ridiculous chair from a race car or a fighter jet. Now it will support your ridiculous body as you play a virtual card game.
Leonard Cohen's "Nevermind" is sliced up differently for each episode of True Detective's second season. Find out what the lyrics mean!
The water got bigger? my sand castle was destroyed and we had to move. Who did this?
Featured articles and columns that don't fit anywhere else on Something Awful.