Local Misanthrope posted:
Wow. This thread astounds me. Sixteen entire pages devoted to just one out of 100,000 registered user. He's a real pisser-offer, all right. Yes, he's an atheist and a complete dick about it. Yes, he "draws" insipid little "cartoons" about nonsense and the rest of you have boo-hoo'd about it more than long enough to get the point across. He's also a gigantic attention whore, that's a given.
Here's a magical, end-all, silver bullet solution! It seems strange and scary at first, but just give it a try, all right? Here goes: IGNORE HIM. Do not feed the trolls. Stuff like this happens when you do. Arguing with him is like arguing with a rhesus monkey: In the end, you'll only get a bunch of shit flung at you. Again, ignore the dickwad.
All of you have better things to do than sit around and bitch about some craterfaced (yes, I've seen his picture) Dawkins-wannabe. This is SA, for God's sake. At least one of you internet detectives could find his information and fuck him over someplace other than the forums.
Almost a decade ago, on my eighteenth birthday I decided to get the Decepticons logo on my forearm. I like transformers about as much as any 26 year old guy. I thought it was great when I was a kid and they are cool looking, but beyond that I couldn't tell you much about them besides their home planet and a few names. It seemed like a good tattoo idea and the artist even made comment about how he had never heard of anyone getting the logo tattooed before . I left the place feeling pretty good about myself and was on my way.
Unfortunatly I had no idea what I was getting myself into. for the past 8 years I have been unable to go more than 2 days without having to talk to a 711 employee or a stoned kid in a slipknot shirt about their favorite transformer or their awesome action figure collection. Its been annoying but bearable.
Then the movie came out. I cant go anywhere without someone saying "Oh man, I bet you are super excited for the movie!" or asking my favorite part (I haven't seen it yet). I would say this happens 3 to 5 times a day. It gets so fucking annoying I want to slice it out of my arm.
The worst part is, I can't even be a dick about it when people blab about transformers to me because its my own stupid fucking fault that I stuck their logo on my forearm. Its not like I have a huge goiter hanging off my neck and people are bringing it up to be assholes. Its something i chose to stick on my body so they just assume "hey, that guys got a transformers logo on his arm, I bet he wants to talk about transformers!", so all I can do is go "yeah, it looks pretty cool. I am gonna go see it this weekend" and try to get out of the conversation as quickly as possible.
The whole point of this thread is that you should ask yourself 2 questions before you even consider getting a pop culture reference permanently inked on yourself.1. Am I sure I am still going to like this in 10 years? and 2. Am I willing to talk to 10 differnt people a day about whatever my tattoo is referencing?
If the answer to either of those questions is no, don't get it or your gonna regret it. No matter how obscure you think it is, it could be the next big thing and then your stuck talking about it to every mouthbreather you run into on the street. This especially applies to bands because, on top of all the other shit I was talking about, they might start sucking and attracting lame fans. Then your stuck looking like a fag with crappy music tastes who shops at hot topic.
Boniface does little else besides read people's post histories in an attempt to find that ultimate internet-detective burn. Don't piss him off, he will quite literally spend the next 36 consecutive hours F5'ing your post history to examine the image properties of any image you may post while scouring for clues and weaknesses you may possess for him to "exploit." I'm going to buy that faggot a custom title one of these days when I get around to it. Maybe I should ask him to design his own title, God fucking knows he has nothing better to do (besides masturbate to hentai and Google/post-history people.) Keep trying man, with a little effort you just may be normal someday!
Nah, I take it back, you probably are doomed to a life of spending more hours per day hunched over your computer than actually moving.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
The Something Awful Forums are, by far, the greatest and most entertaining community on the internet. From the Comedy Goldmine to Photoshop Phriday, our forums are pretty much the lone island refusing to be engulfed by the sea of stupidity that is the internet. While sections like the Comedy Goldmine and Photoshop Phriday showcase the intentionally hilarious forum creations, we've failed to reveal the coin's flip side. The Great Goon Database is a depository of unintentionally amusing Something Awful Forum quotes demonstrating the darker side of SA. Special thanks to Goon "LittleJoe" for collecting and sorting these gems.