Lowtax - Thats great James, where you from?
Jimbo - Phoenix, Arizona. And yourself?
Lowtax - Hold the phones there Ken, the info on your page says Atlanta. You trying to pull the wool over my eyes, James?
Jimbo - He he, no, I live in Atlanta now.
Lowtax - You're not playing mind games with me, are you?
Jimbo - No, I don't do tricks like that.
Lowtax - Tricks? Like card tricks and shit? You dont do em? I used to be a magician you know.
Jimbo - My brother can do some magic.
Lowtax - That's swell, Jim. I was an ace magician back in the day. I was wowing crowds left and right, big audiences, BIG AUDIENCES.
Jimbo - No kidding?
Lowtax - No kidding, you crazy man. I did it part time for college. I was the best.
Lowtax - They called me "Incredible Iriving". I pulled shit outta hats that you wouldn't believe.
Jimbo - Where'd you go to college?
Lowtax - that's none of your business, Jimmy. What I'm saying is that I was the best damn magician those kids had ever seen.
Lowtax - I did crazy kinds of card tricks, made shit disappear, the whole nine yards.
Jimbo - Like what?
Lowtax - Ahh, you know, some kids come up on bikes, and I says "hey kids, want to see a trick?" and I made their bikes disappear and they're all saying how cool it was and shit, and then they're like "can we have our bikes back now?" and I just sit there and laugh at them.
Jimbo - Where'd there bikes go?
Lowtax - To tell you the truth, Ken, I have no clue. It's magic, you know?
Lowtax - So how about them Chiefs, huh?
Jimbo - I'm getting real excited this year...!
Lowtax - WOAH, hold on there a minute Jimbo, I just wanna talk about the Chiefs, not about any crazy sex stuff. I'm not into that shit, okay?
Jimbo - What do you mean?
Did Louis C.K. jerk off in front of two female comics? And why are these ladies squandering an opportunity to learn from a comedy legend?
Elliot said my breakup must have been due to the sweater curse, an unexplained phenomenon where anyone who gives their significant other a hand-knit sweater gets dumped. The only way to break the curse, Elliot said, was to destroy the sweater.
Our Something Awful ICQ pranks target the worst and most idiotic folks on the Internet. Believe it or not, these ICQ pranks are all - unfortunately - real.