Rob - True, but you can definately make more money by investing with us. Let me ask you sir, do you have a credit card?
Lowtax - Yes, several!
Rob - Okay, may I ask you how old you are?
Lowtax - I am 32. Mother is very old, she uses phone much. I dont mind, usually I am out working, but not today, it is Bramble Day at work, we gets day off!
Rob - So, I haven't really gotten any word from you about commiting, are you ready to commit to this? You can make LOTS of money. It will take time, but BELIEVE me, it will happen!
Lowtax - I DONT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT, MISTER
Rob - If you tell me you are ready to commit, I can collect your credit card information, and we can make this happen!
Lowtax - I AM COMMITED TO MOTHER, I CANNOT COMMIT TO YOU SIR
I DONT UNDERSTAND
Rob - What I am trying to say, is that if you give me your credit card information, what we can do is mail you a series of pamphlets and videos telling you how to be rich!
Rob - It is very simple, it makes sense.
Lowtax - Can I give you numbers of credit cards which dont belong to me? I have credits cards of other people I see on subway, take their numbers and stuff?
Rob - No, no, they must belong to you? Do you have a credit card, or am I wasting my time sir?
Lowtax - I HAVE MANY CREDITS CARD S but I dont give them unless I KNOW PERSON Rob
Rob - Well, you know me, don't you?
Lowtax - Are you Ed?
Rob - No, I am Robert
Lowtax - Then I DONT KNOW YOU, SIR
Lowtax - Do NOT try to fool me, I am very smart!
Rob - Well, we could use a 3rd party, such as iEscrow, to transfer the funds. IF you are interested in making money.
Lowtax - I am VERY interested, but you better tells me first about plan to make money! And NO crazy stuff like farming on the moon, crazy things like that! I dont fall for scams, I am smart! TELL ME FIRST OR I DONT GIVE YOU VISA CARD NUMBER PELASE
Rob - Well, what the pamphlets do is educate you about investing, with the right knoweldge, you can be a multi-millionaire!
Lowtax - Like what, crazy stuff??? INVEST IN WHAT? Houses?
Rob - Stocks, and bonds, think like that! Things that the average man doesn't realize about our economy!
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
It's just a little confusing, is all.
Our Something Awful ICQ pranks target the worst and most idiotic folks on the Internet. Believe it or not, these ICQ pranks are all - unfortunately - real.