Broadcast TV and send out the mail insert to all constumers that we have a special deal courtesy of American food cabal PIZZA HUT. Each man and woman live out a fantasy of taste from Pizza Hut with best pizza on menu. All FREE. Coupon covered carrot, tartar sauce, aspic, crawler cheese, bees, sea breeze flavor, ICCCCE, The Rondo, Bob Sapp Fierce Delights, Wintermint, and number one Honshu pizza LOS BULLY.
Truth was all pizza is false pizza. No bottom. Ha ha ha! Got thee!
PREVIOUS FIVE YEARS: Return of MISTER RITTER
Beloved TV hero MISTER RITTER has died of blood impact to cardiovascular nexus. His legend lives on in TVTOKYO 25. All day marathon to celebrate him and usage of computer technology to digitize new information of MISTER RITTER. Computer cannot control bleeding so he is back and is everyone but he dies again and again as quickly as computer can conjure his ghost force. All the best shoes are back, wear them in torment MISTER RITTER. Ha ha ha.
Odd circumstance follow. Even when computer is unplugged on SECOND APRIL it is still conjuring MISTER RITTER. No energy and still he fights on! What a hero! What a insidious beast that was!
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.