The cops are surrounding the house. They got some dogs angry dogs barking, but they'll never find you. You've circled the neighborhood a few times, and no one seems to be following you, except some minivan has been trailing your ass for the last four blocks. Maybe it's a cop. Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. Should you floor it? You're screwed. Ugh, you really don't want to go to ja...Hey, this song is in Rock Band 2.
Push Imaginary Buttons
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.