This article is part of the The Great Authors Series series.



"Word of Wisdom," said Rikkam. "Stay away from the caffeine."

Paros scowled. Rikkam's punch sent the bully flying through the hatch and knocked him into the bathroom tiles. Paros had been a fool to eat three dishes of sweet espresso-juiced ice cream from the meal unit.

His reflexes were wound too tightly and he was insufferably hyper. Rikkam stood over his fallen classmate. He thought about offering Paros a hand, but it was better that Paros pull himself up.

"Was that ice cream worth it?"

Paros was sullen. He lifted his head and wiped blood from the corner of his mouth.

"Yes. It was the most delicious coffee ice cream I have ever tasted, with rich espresso fudge pieces that melted in my mouth. I would do it all over again."

Rikkam gave Paros a sad shake of his head.

"Anyone can make a mistake. Only fools make the same mistake twice." Rikkam left Paros naked on the bathroom floor without saying another word.

More Front Page News

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

About this series

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.